“I would love to host an event but I’m sure nobody will show up.”
“I would get my hair cut like that if my face was shaped like hers.”
“I can’t wear pants like that, not with thighs this big.”
“I was going to raise my hand but nobody wanted to hear what I had to say.”
“It doesn’t matter what I do, the weight just won’t come off.”
“I’ve been wanting to write a book but I’ll never be able to earn a living as an author.”
“I hate my job. I can’t stand my co-workers. I don’t have time.”
And on, and on, and on…
Do any of these sound familiar? This is the sound of negative self-chatter. It lives in our heads, it slips from our lips in everyday conversation, it drives our actions and, believe me, it’s taking its toll. Regular self-bashing can become such a common practice that it’s difficult to recognize, particularly when we wrap it nicely in a self- deprecating joke and tell ourselves, “I’m just being real.” Negativity is destructive and it can derail your best efforts at cultivating a healthy lifestyle. We have to start a new conversation with ourselves.
The average adult has nearly 70,000 thoughts per day - some that just pass through, others that stick around. Take a moment and think about the thoughts that run through your mind. Are they positive and uplifting (“I’m going to do my best.”) or are they doom and gloom (“This is never going to work?”)
Positive thinking may seem like just a buzz word but it’s actually grounded in real neuroscience. Not only can positive thinking boost your mood, but it can also foster resilience, and actually improve brain function. I believe mastering your mindset is the first step to creating a sustainable, healthier lifestyle. It’s the glue that makes any new habit stick. Whatever your new habit or goal may be, whether it’s hosting an event, giving yourself a makeover, speaking up, losing weight, or writing a book, your success will be determined by your mindset.
Everyone has negative thoughts at times but we don’t have to play them on a continuous loop. A snide comment, a past mistake, or a failed relationship doesn’t determine our future. Our attitude and thinking are choices over which we have complete control. Negative thinking might be a natural human condition but positive thinking builds fortitude and helps us grow from negative experiences, daily stresses, and the really hard stuff. We don’t have to accept negativity. Here are some actions steps we can all take right now:
Interrupt negative self-talk
Replace limiting beliefs with self-supporting goals
Stop comparing yourself to others
Embrace change (if you want different results you have to do things differently)
Practice gratitude (by citing affirmations/praying to start your day) SEE BLACK + WELL WEEKLY AFFIRMATIONS ON IG!
Surround yourself with positive energy and positive people
Reflect on negative thoughts then let them go (meditation, journaling, or simply stillness)
Do something good for someone else
Don’t let negativity hold you back!
Courtney Huell: Health Coach, Massage Therapist, and Creator of The Root Lady's Goodies. IG: @routewellness